A Collection Of 1861 Sayings, Humor, And Cruel Realities

What was life like in 1861? Find out by reading these news bits, sayings, and humor pieces published in newspapers that year.

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The beech tree is said to be a non conductor of lightning. So notorious is the fact that the Indians, whenever the sky wears the appearance of a thunder storm, leave their pursuits and take refuge under the nearest beech tree. In Tennessee the people consider it a complete protection. Dr. Becton, in a letter to Dr. Mitchell, states that the beech tree is never known to be struck by atmospheric electricity, while other trees are often shattered into splinters. May not a knowledge of this afford protection to many when exposed?

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The Beaver Dam Citizen says that Mr. J.M. Sherman of Burnett came near losing his life last week by the kick of a horse. His face and jaw are badly injured; some of his teeth were broken, and others driven out of place. (Source)

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There is a woman in Bernardston, over fifty years old, who drinks one quart of laudanum and one quart of ether per week, and has been in the habit of using these stimulants to this extent for twenty years. Sometimes she takes them separately and sometimes mixed. She is dependent on the town for assistance, and the druggist’s bill for the above articles is generally paid by the town. She complains of nervousness. (Source)

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Twenty patriots of the revolution died during the past year. Eighty-two are all that are now left.

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Thirty-five deaths from diphtheria have occurred during the last two weeks at Dunkirk, N.Y.

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A writer in a late British magazine attempts to prove that William Shakespeare never existed, and offers an elaborate argument in defense of his position.

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A merciless landlord in Washington took a poor widow’s last bed for a $2 debt, lately, leaving her with two small children to lie on the floor.

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John Williams, an Englishman, died of starvation in New York. His wife and three children were found nearly exhausted. The children had the smallpox.

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A little boy in Vermont who swallowed a cent last summer is dying slowly by copper poison. His legs have become useless.

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A few days ago, John Stoneker of Autauga, La. fired a gun at his wife, and failing to hit her he drew a knife and was in the act of cutting her throat when his son, a lad of 14 years, picked up a gun and fired at his father, killing him instantly.

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At Fisherville, John Young, son of Mrs. Mary Hart, aged fourteen years, while adjusting some of the machinery in the card room of the Peacock Mill, was caught by the belting and carried around the shaft about 250 times before he could be extricated. He was killed, his whole body being terribly mangled. (Source)

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It is said that there are 30,000 needle women in London.

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All mail matter directed to Florida now goes to the dead letter office. The interception of Government letters by the rebels in that state has rendered this action of the Post Office department necessary.

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Only thirty-five men were killed last year in duels in the United States. (Source)

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A tree near Williams College, Massachusetts is so situated that it draws nourishment from New York, Massachusetts, and Vermont. It stands on the spot where these three States meet.

Mrs. Lovett, of Louisville, Ky., deserted by her husband, who had tried and failed to get a divorce from her, threw vitriol in the eyes of another woman with whom her husband was keeping company. The woman’s face was badly burned and her sight destroyed.

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A new mode of punishment has been adopted at the Sing Sing State Prison, which is to shave off all the hair except a tuft on top of the head. This is called the “Japanese comb,” and the prisoners had rather bear the shower bath than suffer it because it makes them a laughing stock among their fellows.

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A Portuguese giant, represented to be upwards of eight feet high, has arrived at Madrid, and is about to be exhibited.

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There is a girl of twenty-one in the prison at Morgantown, Va., who has become hopelessly insane from inordinate use of tobacco.

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Mr. Frederick Bailey attempted to run in front of a train at East Kingston, N.H., and was run over and instantly killed.

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The London Chemical News states that hundreds of barrels of the clarified fat of horses are imported from Ostend to England, and sold in London for genuine butter. (Source)

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A lady walked from Troy to Albany in her night clothes on Sunday night before last, in a state of somnambulism. The night was cold.

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Druidical remains, similar to those in Ireland, and the hoarstones of England and Scotland, have been discovered in India.

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It is said of the French ladies that their fondness of effect runs to such excess that widows who have lost their husbands practice attitudes of despair before a looking glass.

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A young lady in Janesville, dressing for church, swallowed one of the pins she had in her mouth and nearly died. The doctor opened her windpipe and took out the pin, after three hours labor, and the patient is now doing well.

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A lady now lives in the town of Gainesville, Wyoming Co., N.Y., by the name of Jenison, aged ninety-one years, seventy of which have been spent in weaving, and last autumn she paired, cored, and strung twenty bushels of apples.

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An attempt is making in England, by numerous societies for that purpose, to obtain a repeal of the duty on hops, it having leaked out lately that the brewers use strychnine instead of hops in making ale, owing to the scarcity and high price of hops. (Source)

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Mrs. Julia Howard, a resident of Glasgow, Scotland, gave birth recently to a pair of twins, in the sixty-seventh year of her age.

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Mary Harper and two small children were frozen to death near Quebec, Canada, by exposure, having no place to lodge. (Source)

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The French distillers are making brandy out of coal.

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Miss Helen Harriman, of Corinth, committed suicide by cutting her throat. No cause is assigned for the act.

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Great Britain spends on an average $260,000,000 annually for war, and for education less than $500,000.

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The smartest young butcher in New York is named Gorman. He can kill and dress a sheep in 4 minutes 24 seconds, and did it on Wednesday for a wager. His competitor, a veteran butcher named Darby, occupied 6 minutes and 26 seconds in performing the same operation.

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H.H. Ballard, Owen Co., writes to the American Agriculturist, that with one-fourth pound of gunpowder he can keep every rat from his premises for a year. “The powder is not used to drive a bullet or shot through the animals, but is simply burned in small quantities, say a teaspoonful in a place, along their usual paths, and at the holes where they come out, with proper precautions to prevent accidents from fire.” He says he has proved its efficacy by repeated trials. The rat has a keen sense of smell, and if he has sense enough to know that he is not wanted when he perceives the odor of the burnt powder, the remedy will be of great value. Let our readers experiment and report if the value of this method can be ratified. (Source)

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A Mrs. Heathman, of Cambridge, Illinois, died on Sunday of last week, from hydrophobia [rabies]. She was bitten some eight weeks before by her own dog. Her death was dreadful. So great were her sufferings that she begged of her attendants to kill her.

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The N.Y. World sounds the alarm to the people of that city, stating that the smallpox is now raging very severely, more so than at any time in many years. The Health Inspector, week before last, reports that there were twelve deaths from that disease, which is at the rate of 624 per year.

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We regret to learn that the switchman on the Illinois Central Railroad was run over while disconnecting a freight train on Monday morning last. The car passed over both legs just above the hip joint. He lived but a few minutes. We understand that he was not married.

The Inaugural highly pleases all Democrats who care more to see the Union preserved than to see the Republican party defeated and their old allies in the South successful in destroying the Government.

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The other day we saw a gentleman stop and give a poor woman a kind word, and money sufficient to purchase a pair of shoes to protect her feet. We saw the same man on the cars between here and Milwaukee, about two years ago, and have not met him since till last week. About two years since we were on the train, and there was also aboard a poor woman with not money enough to pay her fare. The conductor was about to put her off the cars between the station when the gentleman alluded to ordered the conductor to desist, enquired the amount he wanted, and paid the woman’s fare. She tried to thank him but he begged her not to think of it for, he said, “I charge all such little accounts to God. He and I have a long running account.” (Source)

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A little two-and-a-half year old daughter of a Mrs. Metcalf of St. Louis, lately fell through some loose planks into a deep well, when the mother immediately jumped in and held the child at arm’s length above the water for nearly an hour, calling vainly for help. At last, taking off her shoes, with the assistance of a loose board, the heroic mother managed to crawl near enough to the top to throw her child beyond the edge of the well, and then extricated herself. The first words the child spoke after the mother had found it in the well were: “Mother, don’t cry. We’ll get out yet.” (Source)

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A Pig Resurrection. – The story we are about to relate is somewhat remarkable and may not digest easily with the incredulous, but it is never less true, and may prove a valuable hint to farmers and stock owners:

A week or two since, one extremely cold night, a little of eight young pigs were frozen stiff and lifeless. Being of a valuable breed, their loss was duly lamented, and for temporary removal they were hastily covered up with manure just outside the barn. When going to do the evening work at the barn, a suppressed squealing was heard in the direction of the deceased larders, and upon investigation it was found that the natural warmth of their “hospitable grave” had restored them to life and an excellent appetite. All but one are now alive and kicking, and promise well for the coming pork market.

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A Frog Story. – The Hartford Press prints the story about six ladies of Toledo swallowing live frogs to cure them of consumption, and follows it up with another:

A couple of gentlemen from a neighboring town, who were called to watch with a sick person who had been given over by the doctors and apparently had but a short time to live, after some conversation relative to the improbability of stories of recovery by frogs inhaling a sick person’s breath, resolved to test it. The first frog placed at the dying man’s mouth was as dead as Julius Caesar after only three breaths had been drawn; the second lives some time longer and died; the third lived about half an hour, and though others were applied none of them died. The  sick person immediately began to mend, and finally recovered. The parties to the transaction, who tell the story themselves, are highly respectable.” (Source)

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The North is consolidated as one man, and the government is to be sustained at all hazards. The South has treated us as a foreign, hostile power, and we can no longer treat or temporize. WE MUST FIGHT.

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Mrs. Nancy Webb, a lady ninety years old, was killed by her son-in-law. He was insane from the effect of a fever from which he had scarcely recovered and had been left alone with her but a few moments, during which he attacked and beat her with a hoe until she was so injured that she lived but thirty-six hours afterwards.

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The War Feeling Here. – We are glad to state that the feeling here in behalf of the Union as it was, and the Constitution as it is, is growing stronger every day, and that if we have a Tory in our midst any longer, we do not know who he is. Democrats vie with Republicans in their disposition to strengthen the arm of the Government, and stand ready to contribute cheerfully of their means to help defray the expenses attending the enlistment of volunteers. This is right. We are no longer Democrats and Republicans, but Union men. This is the only motto that we should have at the North. Follow the stars and stripes wherever they go, and stand by the Government in any emergency, whatever it may be.

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The city of New Orleans is immensely excited, and everybody seems anxious for a fight. They think they can whip the north and make mere child’s play of it. They say they will take Fort Pickens if it costs a thousand lives. (Source)

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A few nights ago a child about two years and a half old, residing in St. Philip street, had her stomach filled with cockroaches, which crept in her mouth while she was sleeping. The poor little girl became suddenly ill, and in spite of every remedy used for the destruction of the vermin, they continued to live and gnaw her vitals, and death ended her terrible sufferings the night before last.

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The new territory of Nevada is twice as large as the island of Great Britain, and larger than New york, Pennsylvania, and new England. Its population is 9,000. It is formed from portions of Utah,, new Mexico, and Washington Territories, and a portion of Eastern California. (Source)

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Beyond doubt 900 Confederate Troops are posted between Point of Rocks and Williamsport, on the Potomac. Among them are 300 Cherokees. Apprehension prevails of an invasion into the Cumberland Valley from Virginia. Great damage might be done.

Mr. Frederick West was employed in a well at Feltonville, when the earth and well caved in, burying him so that when he was taken out, life was extinct.

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Florence Nightingale is at the head of St. Thomas’ Hospital, an institution commenced in 1223 by a pious woman, as an almonry for indigent children and necessitous proselytes. She is likewise at the head of a school for nurses.

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Last Friday afternoon, a child of Mr. Daily – four or five years old, while playing on some timber near Butler’s mill, fell into the river and was drowned. Several other children were present when the accident happened, but before the alarm was given, it was too late for assistance.

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Mary W. Dennis, 5 feet 2 inches high, is 1st Lieutenant of the Stillwater company, Minnesota. She baffled even the inspection of the surgeon of the regiment in discovering her sex, but was recognized by a St. Paul printer, who became shockingly frightened after threats of vengeance upon him if he exposed her, and he decamped. (Source)

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We were yesterday shown a five-barrel revolving pistol which has every appearance of being a very valuable arm for service. It is self-cocking, and fires with great rapidity. One of the wealthiest men in the Union is said to be interested in the movement. Sharp’s Rifle Company are arranging for a large increase of their works. (Source)

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Mrs. Hook, an Irish woman, was arraigned in Chicago last week for whipping her husband. Probably she thought there was no harm in bating her hook.

A fortune hunter, being in a ballroom, heard a gentleman give an account of the death of a rich old widow. “Died yesterday, in her eighty-ninth year,” said the narrator. “What a pity!” exclaimed the fortune hunter. “What a fine match she would have made a few days ago.” (Source)

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Feed Bones To Hens. – If you take fresh bones from the kitchen, and with a sledge on a rock, or any natural or artificial anvil, pound them up into small pieces, hens will eat them ravenously, and not only will they digest the bones and make a better manure than can be made in any other way, but they will be themselves greatly benefited by them; they will lay throughout the season with much greater regularity than otherwise, and fatten on the marrow within, and the fat and muscle will adhere to the bones.

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At Salisbury, Mass., Mrs. Moses Garden committed suicide by hanging herself; cause – spiritual hallucination. This amounted to insanity.

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A boy names Alexander F. Brown, son of Mr. Alexander Brown of Fall River, while fishing off one of the wharves, fell into the river and was drowned. He was between six and seven years of age.

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Union meetings are held almost nightly in all the principal towns and cities in California. Speeches and resolutions are invariably in favor of a vigorous war policy. The Union feeling is so prominent that there will probably be no disturbance of the peace in California.

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A correspondent at Philadelphia informs the Boston Journal, that one company of the Ohio regiment, which is now encamped below that city, contains sixteen brothers. Their name is Fisch. They were all born in Germany. This remarkable incident has attracted general notice and the brothers will be made the recipients of an ovation soon to be given. (Source)

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A spy was arrested here this morning, who had full details of the number of troops, and the position and strength of batteries around Washington. There was also found upon him a sketch of a plan of attack upon the city. He had the position of all the mounted cannon in the vicinity of the city. (Source)

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The fight at Edward’s Ferry, on Monday, seems to have been a rather serious affair, as we learn from Virginians who came over for protection, that between 40 and 50 were killed by the bombs that were thrown with so much accuracy among them from a howitzer on this side. A boat load of rebels were crossing the mouth of a small creek making into the river, towards the close of the action, when a bomb from the Federal battery burst immediately over it, and after the smoke cleared away, only two men were seen standing, out of between 20 or 30 in the boat. Many bodies were distinctly seen floating in the water about the boat.

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A young man named Hathaway was instantly killed on the Chicago and Northwestern Railroad, near Clinton, Rock county, a week ago yesterday morning. He was standing beside the boiler on the passage leading from the engineer’s room to the front of the engine, and slipping, became entangled in a driving wheel which caught his hip and mangled him in a shocking manner. He was fireman of the train, and at the time of the accident was oiling the engine which was in motion. Deceased had a father and sister residing in Bellville.

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There is a family in Ohio so lazy that is takes two of them to sneeze – one to throw the head back and the other to make the noise.

A woman who recently had her butter seized by the clerk of the market for short weight, gave as a reason that the cow from which the butter was made was subject to a cramp, and that caused the butter to shrink in weight. (Source)

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The following fact has been established by careful observation: That where sunlight penetrates all the rooms of a house the inmates are less liable to sickness than in a house where the apartments lose its health-invigorating influences. Basement rooms are the nurses of indisposition. It is a great mistake to compel human beings to reside partially underground. There is a defective condition of the air in such rooms, connected with dampness, besides decomposing paint on the walls, and the escape of noxious gasses from pipes and drains. All school rooms, especially, should be open to the sunlight, yet as a general rule, they are darkened like a parlor.

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Three female (secessionist) regiments are being formed in Tennessee. V.F. suggests that they be known as the Chemisette Chasseurs, the Crinoline Carbineers, and the Calico Cadets. Let them come North if they desire a general engagement. Champions of union aim straight at their hearts! It is of no use to shoot at their pericraniums, for everybody knows that a lady is never livelier than when she has a ball in her head. (Source)

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A company of emigrants for California, who left this State last spring, was murdered by the Indians near Salt Lake. A member of the company was sent ahead to procure suitable camping grounds, and on returning found all whom he had left in their blood, and their property gone. – This is probably the work of the Mormons.

The Rebels Safe At The North. – The Savannah Republican informs its readers that, contrary to the ideas conceived at the South, Southern people who come North are perfectly safe. The editor says he saw a letter from a resident of Savannah now in New York, in which he expresses his astonishment at the respect with which he is everywhere treated, after all the blood thirsty stories he had read in the newspapers.

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The King of Siam has written a letter to the Emperor of France on a sheet of fine gold. (Source)

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The “ladies” of Alexandria mostly remain shut up in their houses, but as soldiers of the Union pass, they actually spit upon them from their windows! The Secession mania seems to convert the women into spiteful furies, and the men into thieves and perjurers. (Source)

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One of the inmates of the Butler insane asylum at Providence, was lately a prosperous Baltimore merchant. Secession troubles broke up his business, rendered him insolvent, took from him two sons now in the rebel army, and finally bereft him of his reason. His wife, an invalid, residing near Providence, on failing to receive letters from him as usual, was al last informed of his situation, and from that time declined to her grave. She was buried a few days since. (Source)

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Davenport, Iowa, is infested with mad dogs and a number of persons have been bitten by them.

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A freshly arrived Norwegian was hired a day or two ago by Mr. Daggett, living about two miles from this city. Yesterday he was digging potatoes in the hot sun, and was observed to leave his work and go to the well, where he drank two dippers full of cold water, shortly afterwards he staggered to the barn, and medical aid was summoned, but it was of no avail, as he died in an hour or two. The danger of drinking deeply of cold water in warm weather should be widely made known.

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He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals. (Source)

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Poisoned bullets were used by the rebels at the battle of Rich Mountain. A chemical analysis has disclosed the fact that the bullets were covered with a poisonous paste.

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Mormons have declared their intention to separate from the United States, and erect their territory into an independent province. They also seized a vast amount of Government stores, and provisions were so plenty that bacon was only half a cent per lb. They declare that no more government trains will be allowed to go through the territory.

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England seems to be a “Chamber of Horrors.” London Times well remarks, “crimes of the worst dye lie in profusion before us.” Within a few days the papers have recounted the details of a father inflicting murderous blows on his only son; two gentlemen shooting, hacking, and smashing one another to death in a back drawing room in a by-street in the Strand; a surgeon charged with a professional murder upon an unhappy patient; several husbands murdering their wives; a lady attacking her aged mother with a bludgeon; a boy stabbing his schoolfellow; a poor girl impaled by a runaway horse on the railings of Eaton square; a miller murdering his wife because of a wrangle about a trifle of money as they drove home from market; one man killing another with a pitcher because he aroused him from bed to ask a business question; and various minor crimes. (Source)

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A “wild man of the woods” has been creating a good deal of consternation lately in Other Western Massachusetts, and along the towns across the Vermont line. It turns out that he is nothing but a student, who assumed the gorilla guise in a frolic which might have cost him his life. In Vermont, he was pursued with guns, but so frightened his pursuers by his hideous appearance that they could not shoot straight, and he escaped harm. (Source)

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In these days when diseases of the throat are so universally prevalent and so many cases fatal, we feel it our duty to say a word in behalf of a simple, and what has been to us a most effective preventative, if not a positive cure of sore throat. During the whole of a life of more than forty years we have been subject to sore throat, and more particularly to a dry hacking cough, which was not only distressing to ourselves but to our friends and to these with whom we were brought into business contact.

Last fall we were induced to try what virtue there is in common salt. We commenced by using it three times a day, – morning, noon, and night. We dissolved a large table spoonful of pure table salt in about a half tumbler of cold water. With this we gargled the throat most thoroughly just before meal time. The result has been that during the entire winter we were not only free from the usual coughs and colds, to which so far as our memory extends, we have always been subject, but the hacking cough has entirely disappeared. We attribute these satisfactory results solely to the use of salt gargle, and do most cordially recommend a trial of it to those of our readers who are subject to diseases of the throat.

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A man named Wheatlad died in Clinton, Iowa, last week, of hydrophobia. He was bitten by a dog nine years ago, and the canine virus seems to have remained semi dormantly in his system until now. He had to be locked in an old freight car in order to prevent his injuring those in attendance upon him.

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Some workmen who were unloading a cargo of hides from one of the Boston wharves the other day, were rather surprised to encounter a boa constrictor curled up in one of the skins. The consternation of the workmen was very amusing, but the snake being in a torpid state, was easily captures without injury to anybody. (Source)

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The patriots of the Revolution never uttered a more noble sentiment than Gov. Sprague of Rhode Island expressed when he said, “Wealth is useless unless it promotes the public welfare, and life itself but a bauble unless it promotes the honor and glory of our country.”

When the fortress of Weinsberg, Germany, was about to be stormed, the women obtained permission to come out carrying with them whatever they deemed most valuable. What was the surprise of the besiegers when they issued from the gate, each carrying her husband upon her back. (Source)

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In Western Kentucky where the Secessionists are in the majority, the slaves belonging to the rebels, as well as the Union men, are all made by the rebels to believe that if Jeff. Davis succeed, they will be made free. All the slaves, no matter by whom owned, are dangerously insolent to the Union men, and especially to the female portion of the families of the latter. The rebels employ their slaves in sacking farms and running off chattels and stock belonging to the Union men. (Source)

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The Indian Territory west of Arkansas, contains 72,000 square miles, considerably more than all the New England States, and is one of the finest regions of that size on the face of the globe. It may be said to be now uninhabited, contrasting its great extent with the smallness of the number of its occupants. Recent events will enable the National Government to take any measures, in reference to it, called for by the general good, the treaties with most of the occupying tribes being abrogated by their joining our enemies. What gives peculiar importance to this territory is the fact that it is adapted to the growth of cotton. (Source)

Author: StrangeAgo